Another View of Christmas
It’s snowing out tonight,
the garden looks enchanting.
Beside an open fire
the dogs are lying, panting.
Right here in my lap,
so satisfied and cosy,
the cat is fast asleep,
and even I feel dozy.
Reflected in the window
I see the Christmas tree,
the tinsel and the baubles,
the fairy lights and me.
Oh yes, I’m here, of course
but where are you, you peasant?
You promised you’d be back,
you promised me a present!
There’s holly and there’s ivy,
there’s mistletoe (for kissing)
there’s softly glowing candles.
There’s only one thing missing!
It’s you, you rat, you bum!
You’re driving me insane, dear.
Just get yourself back home.
You, and your wretched reindeer!
CS
Winter solstice chills the ground;
festivals of light abound.
Now, in winter's cold dark tomb,
candlelight relieves the gloom.
As the soft flames dance and flicker
hearts beat just a little quicker.
Celebrations cheer the soul,
lift the spirit and console.
Religion, too, will play its part
in nourishing the hungry heart
at this time of long dark nights
with its attendant fears and frights.
Ivy, mistletoe, and holly
help to make the houses jolly;
gold and frankincense and myrrh
combine to make the senses stir.
Christians celebrate the birth
of the Christ-child come to earth
so, for all with faith sublime,
Blessings at this Christmas time!
If by faith you are a Jew
Happy Hannukah to you!
Menorah candles gaily glow
in memory of long ago.
Agnostics also deck the halls -
Season's Greetings to you all -
and if you live by Wicca's rule,
Merry meet, my friends. Good Yule!
CS
An alternative 12 Days for these days of austerity:
On the 12th day of Christmas my lover sent to me:
Twelve plumbers plumbing
Eleven gripers griping
Ten ladies weeping
Nine chancers chancing
Eight traders sinking
Seven dealers skimming
Six fleeces fraying
Five old things.
Four plastic turds
Three cheap pens
Two rubber gloves
And a cartridge for my HP
CS
Bah, Humbug!
Christmas comes but once a year
and when it comes it brings good cheer
cheer to all the girls and boys
with their stockings full of toys.
Stockings? Nowadays it’s sacks!
Christmas Greetings sent by fax
fathers boast of what they’ve bought
mothers just get very fraught
go on endless shopping trips
fret about expanding hips
shopping trolleys overflowing
where is all the money going?
Have we got enough to drink?
God! the TV’s on the blink!
So much food it’s going rotten
presents bought so soon forgotten
decorations thrown away
that’s it - end of holiday.
When you really work it out
what is Christmas all about?
Buy and sell and wads of cash
generating tons of trash.
CS
Sonnet
It’s Christmastime and snow is all around.
The moon is shining brightly up above
and, listening quietly, I can hear the sound
of carollers, proclaiming God’s great love.
In almost every home there stands a tree
bedecked with tinsel, baubles, fairy-lights.
With all this going on it’s plain to see
that this must be the merriest of nights.
And yet, it must be said, there’s something wrong
with merriment that’s only now and then;
Despite the loud festivity and song
where is the peace on earth, goodwill to men?
For Jesus did not come to earth for this.
Is Christmastime the modern Judas kiss?
CS
12 Drunken Days
On the first day of Christmas my hubby put away
a gallon of home made beer.
On the second day of Christmas my hubby put away
2 whisky sours and a gallon of home made beer.
On the third day of Christmas my hubby put away
3 gin slings, 2 whisky sours and a gallon of home made beer.
On the fourth day of Christmas my hubby put away
4 rum and cokes, 3 gin slings, 2 whisky sours and a gallon of home made beer.
On the fifth day of Christmas my hubby put away
5 single malts
4 rum and cokes, 3 gin slings, 2 whisky sours and a gallon of home made beer.
On the sixth day of Christmas my hubby put away 6 gin and tonics,
5 single malts
4 rum and cokes, 3 gin slings, 2 whisky sours and a gallon of home made beer.
On the seventh day of Christmas my hubby put away 7 small sherries, 6 gin and tonics,
5 single malts,
4 rum and cokes, 3 gin slings, 2 whisky sours and a gallon of home made beer.
On the eighth day of Christmas my hubby put away 8 port and lemons, 7 small sherries, 6 gin and tonics,
5 single malts
4 rum and cokes, 3 gin slings, 2 whisky sours and a gallon of home made beer.
On the ninth day of Christmas my hubby put away
9 brandy cobblers, 8 port and lemons, 7 small sherries, 6 gin and tonics,
5 single malts
4 rum and cokes, 3 gin slings, 2 whisky sours and a gallon of home made beer.
On the tenth day of Christmas my hubby put away10 Bloody Marys, 9 brandy cobblers
8 port and lemons, 7 small sherries, 6 gin and tonics,
5 single malts
4 rum and cokes, 3 gin slings, 2 whisky sours and a gallon of home made beer.
On the eleventh day of Christmas my hubby put away 11 prairie oysters, 10 bloody marys,
9 brandy cobblers, 8 port and lemons, 7 small sherries, 6 gin and tonics,
5 single malts
4 rum and cokes, 3 gin slings, 2 whisky sours and a gallon of home made beer.
On the twelfth day of Christmas my hubby put away 12 Alka Seltzas, 11 prairie oysters,
10 Bloody Marys, 9 brandy cobblers, 8 port and lemons, 7 small sherries, 6 gin and tonics,
5 single malts
4 rum and cokes, 3 gin slings, 2 whisky sours and a gallon of home made beer.
CS
